I am having issues with this right now. I really find it disturbing when you are treated like a walking uterus. There is respect that needs to flow both ways for this to be successful. And, not just baby successful, but emotionally also.
I can play devils advocate for a min also. There are many on the other side that say, look you are getting paid so basically that is what you are. I hear surrogates whom refer to themselves in the same way. There is not enough money in the world to make me lie down and let someone walk all over me.
This is a sore subject to me right now. LOL Can you tell??? :)
XOXOXO
Sunday, June 22, 2014
Monday, June 9, 2014
Yay for June!!
I have never been so happy to see a month go away. This past May is probably one of the worst months we have had in, I don't know how long.
May 1st is when the Dr called with G's blood work. The + HIV test. And, it went down hill from there. Watching my husband break down over these stupid results. Arguing with the IVF clinic. I then seperated from the couple I was matched with. Which I really liked them. It would of been a good journey with them. But, I think there would of been some resentment on their end if they would of moved clinics and things didn't work. It would of been my fault for refusing to work with the first clinic, so I decided it would just be better to let them find another GS.
Then the crazy IM's started. OMG. The agency called me with a profile. That was very exciting. Her profile right off the bat said that she didn't want her surro to heat things up in plastic dishes in the microwave, didn't want her to cook in pans with scratches in the teflon. Ok, I email the agency. Is she going to be demanding? I don't work that way. I am just as stubborn and I do not do well with someone micromanaging me. Plus, I am a hair dyer. I dye my hair through out pregnancy. Always have. And, if she doesn't want me to heat my food in a plastic bowl, we may have problems. So, we set up a time to chat. We actually had a great conversation. Talked for about 90 min on the phone. Chatted through email. She wanted to work with me. We came to a understanding about my dye. LOL So, a couple days go by. I send her a email with all my info. Name, address, ... that kind of stuff. Not a big deal, right? I figure if I am going to be trusted to carry your baby, we might need to have a open policy, right? Well, she didn't want to give me any of her info. Huh? I think that is the oddest thing. This is not a one way street with trust. I need to be able to trust you also. And, if you can't even share your last name, or your address with me, then I think we have bigger issues. So, this is happening, I email the clinic and tell them, I don't think this is a good match. There are some major trust issues happening here. The IM emails me telling me that she doesn't want to have to share her info if she doesn't want to. Huh? So, ya, no go.
Crazy IM #2 comes along. Contacts me from my ad. I see she is also from NY. Hmmm. I tell her that we can chat, but if she is working with New Hope that its a no go. We talk on the phone the next day, I tell her my story of whoa with the clinic, and she has had just about the same horrible time with them. So, we chat about it. She still has a surrogate. They just had a negative cycle the week before. Plus she doesn't like my fees. So, I tell her she still has some work to do on her end before she even starts looking for a nother surrogate. She needs to figure out what is happening with her current surro. Not a problem, good luck! The next day New Hope contacts me so I can fill out a release of information for the IM. WHAT????? She called them and said we were working together so she could get my info. I was floored. I told them that in no way were they to give any of my info to her. OMG! Crazy!!
Then the topper to all of this craziness is that G's dirt bike was stolen. Just 2 weeks before he was to leave for Mexico with it. When it first happened, I told him not to stress thats why we have insurance. I figure I could claim it under our home policy, as its a dirt bike and not a street bike. Insurance says No way!! Uhg.
Was a terrible month. I am hoping for much better news in the coming months.
xoxoxoxo
May 1st is when the Dr called with G's blood work. The + HIV test. And, it went down hill from there. Watching my husband break down over these stupid results. Arguing with the IVF clinic. I then seperated from the couple I was matched with. Which I really liked them. It would of been a good journey with them. But, I think there would of been some resentment on their end if they would of moved clinics and things didn't work. It would of been my fault for refusing to work with the first clinic, so I decided it would just be better to let them find another GS.
Then the crazy IM's started. OMG. The agency called me with a profile. That was very exciting. Her profile right off the bat said that she didn't want her surro to heat things up in plastic dishes in the microwave, didn't want her to cook in pans with scratches in the teflon. Ok, I email the agency. Is she going to be demanding? I don't work that way. I am just as stubborn and I do not do well with someone micromanaging me. Plus, I am a hair dyer. I dye my hair through out pregnancy. Always have. And, if she doesn't want me to heat my food in a plastic bowl, we may have problems. So, we set up a time to chat. We actually had a great conversation. Talked for about 90 min on the phone. Chatted through email. She wanted to work with me. We came to a understanding about my dye. LOL So, a couple days go by. I send her a email with all my info. Name, address, ... that kind of stuff. Not a big deal, right? I figure if I am going to be trusted to carry your baby, we might need to have a open policy, right? Well, she didn't want to give me any of her info. Huh? I think that is the oddest thing. This is not a one way street with trust. I need to be able to trust you also. And, if you can't even share your last name, or your address with me, then I think we have bigger issues. So, this is happening, I email the clinic and tell them, I don't think this is a good match. There are some major trust issues happening here. The IM emails me telling me that she doesn't want to have to share her info if she doesn't want to. Huh? So, ya, no go.
Crazy IM #2 comes along. Contacts me from my ad. I see she is also from NY. Hmmm. I tell her that we can chat, but if she is working with New Hope that its a no go. We talk on the phone the next day, I tell her my story of whoa with the clinic, and she has had just about the same horrible time with them. So, we chat about it. She still has a surrogate. They just had a negative cycle the week before. Plus she doesn't like my fees. So, I tell her she still has some work to do on her end before she even starts looking for a nother surrogate. She needs to figure out what is happening with her current surro. Not a problem, good luck! The next day New Hope contacts me so I can fill out a release of information for the IM. WHAT????? She called them and said we were working together so she could get my info. I was floored. I told them that in no way were they to give any of my info to her. OMG! Crazy!!
Then the topper to all of this craziness is that G's dirt bike was stolen. Just 2 weeks before he was to leave for Mexico with it. When it first happened, I told him not to stress thats why we have insurance. I figure I could claim it under our home policy, as its a dirt bike and not a street bike. Insurance says No way!! Uhg.
Was a terrible month. I am hoping for much better news in the coming months.
xoxoxoxo
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