We are officially 11dpo today. Now, we are in OPK testing mode. Lines are still light. So, no freaking out yet. My IF will be here Sunday! Can't wait! Haven't seen him in a month. LOL Will miss W though. He is a busy guy. :)
Have a great day! xoxo
Friday, March 23, 2012
And, may the odds be ever in your favor!
Happy Hunger games!!! Waiting on Alex to get home so we can head to the theater. I don't want to even attempt to go tonight. That will be a mad house.
We are officially 11dpo today. Now, we are in OPK testing mode. Lines are still light. So, no freaking out yet. My IF will be here Sunday! Can't wait! Haven't seen him in a month. LOL Will miss W though. He is a busy guy. :)
Have a great day! xoxo
We are officially 11dpo today. Now, we are in OPK testing mode. Lines are still light. So, no freaking out yet. My IF will be here Sunday! Can't wait! Haven't seen him in a month. LOL Will miss W though. He is a busy guy. :)
Have a great day! xoxo
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Done? NEVER!! Haha!
No clomid for me today! Woot!! Yesterday was my last pill. Thank god!! Meditation is in overdrive right now. Haha.
My trigger meds showed up yesterday. One thing I have learned by reading, researching, obsessing, going OCD, whatever you want to call it, is this. While starting to freak out yesterday, I learned that clomid raises the estrogen in your body, which in turn , makes your body start up with the cervical mucus. That is my key tell-tale sign. For those that don't really know the female body (*cough* W. LOL), you have a few different types of cervical mucus that happen before you get your surge. Different types equal different things. Well, after seeing egg-white CM yesterday (the fertile kind right at surge time). I was all kinds of crazy trying to make sure I wasn't already gearing up for ovulation. My IF is not due here until Sunday. I can already see that call. "You need to be HERE tomorrow!" STAT! But, after looking up many things, there is a reason they tell you to chill for 3 days after your last pill.
So, thats where we are. Chilling. LOL Friday I will start with the OPKs. It is earlier than I would normally start, but Drs orders. I would love to see a surge either Tues or Wed. That would help me a ton with work. Haha.
My trigger meds showed up yesterday. One thing I have learned by reading, researching, obsessing, going OCD, whatever you want to call it, is this. While starting to freak out yesterday, I learned that clomid raises the estrogen in your body, which in turn , makes your body start up with the cervical mucus. That is my key tell-tale sign. For those that don't really know the female body (*cough* W. LOL), you have a few different types of cervical mucus that happen before you get your surge. Different types equal different things. Well, after seeing egg-white CM yesterday (the fertile kind right at surge time). I was all kinds of crazy trying to make sure I wasn't already gearing up for ovulation. My IF is not due here until Sunday. I can already see that call. "You need to be HERE tomorrow!" STAT! But, after looking up many things, there is a reason they tell you to chill for 3 days after your last pill.
So, thats where we are. Chilling. LOL Friday I will start with the OPKs. It is earlier than I would normally start, but Drs orders. I would love to see a surge either Tues or Wed. That would help me a ton with work. Haha.
Monday, March 19, 2012
Views
After my last post, I thought I might clear up a few things.
As long as each person in a TS arrangement is having their needs met, then all is well. What I want to happen in my jouney is not what each TS wants. We each have our own desires. Just like IPs. What one IP finds acceptable might not be to another. Thats why matches fall through all the time. Its trying to find that other half that you are comfortable with. That you can make this work with. Surrogacy, TS or GS, is hard. There are many ups and downs for both sides. Like a relationship you have to have both sides working together. It can't be all give from one side. That won't work.
Damn good thing today was my last clomid pill. Haha. I might start getting lots of hate mail from my blogs. Haha. Just have to try not to bite anyones heads off. :)
As long as each person in a TS arrangement is having their needs met, then all is well. What I want to happen in my jouney is not what each TS wants. We each have our own desires. Just like IPs. What one IP finds acceptable might not be to another. Thats why matches fall through all the time. Its trying to find that other half that you are comfortable with. That you can make this work with. Surrogacy, TS or GS, is hard. There are many ups and downs for both sides. Like a relationship you have to have both sides working together. It can't be all give from one side. That won't work.
Damn good thing today was my last clomid pill. Haha. I might start getting lots of hate mail from my blogs. Haha. Just have to try not to bite anyones heads off. :)
Sunday, March 18, 2012
My Child..Your Child.. Our Child?
Traditional surrogacy is not for the faint of heart. There are so many emotional ties that sometimes it becomes hard to figure out what is the best path to take. Some surrogates don't see traditional surrogacy any differently than gestational surrogacy. I am not one of those surrogates. TS is my genetic child. I look at my GS babe and don't see my own child. I look at the TS/ED babies and see my traits. I see my daughters eyes, my nose, etc.. That is something you can't deny, no matter how pretty you package it. Is it a coping defense to think of it that way? To try and ease the pain? I love these children. All of them. I do not want to parent them. But, I am protective of them. I want happy, healthy lives for them.
I have always been very open and honest with Alex (my daughter) about these babies. My theory is if everything is open now, there is no room for anything to bite you in the butt later on. KWIM? I have seen/heard of many IPs lying to their children, well into ages where they would understand the terminology, about the biological connection. One of my pre-reqs before working with any IP is that things are to remain open. Alex refers to them as sister/brother. She is a only child at home. I tell her she has the best of both worlds. Only child at home, yet has sisters/brother she gets to visit. :)
We are now getting to a point where these babies are not babies anymore. They understand so many things now. It seemed like it was ok to let Alex refer to them as siblings at the beginning, but now maybe not so much. Of course, you can see the reasoning behind it. The children are still young enough not to understand the big picture. But, by knowing they have a sister whom doesn't live with them, it creates many more questions. But, by shutting the door to this, it hurts my own daughter. I have tried to keep her shielded from being hurt. But, I think one of the issues of being honest with her is that she is susceptible to being hurt.
Is this a issue with working with IMs? With 2 IFs there will always be the question of "who is my mom"? Obviously 2 men can't procreate by themselves. So, does working with men stop that pain from happening?
I don't know. I am rambling tonight. This clomid is making me all moody, emotional, crazy.. you name it, I am probably going through it. I would think I was pregnant if I was later in the cycle. LOL
I have always been very open and honest with Alex (my daughter) about these babies. My theory is if everything is open now, there is no room for anything to bite you in the butt later on. KWIM? I have seen/heard of many IPs lying to their children, well into ages where they would understand the terminology, about the biological connection. One of my pre-reqs before working with any IP is that things are to remain open. Alex refers to them as sister/brother. She is a only child at home. I tell her she has the best of both worlds. Only child at home, yet has sisters/brother she gets to visit. :)
We are now getting to a point where these babies are not babies anymore. They understand so many things now. It seemed like it was ok to let Alex refer to them as siblings at the beginning, but now maybe not so much. Of course, you can see the reasoning behind it. The children are still young enough not to understand the big picture. But, by knowing they have a sister whom doesn't live with them, it creates many more questions. But, by shutting the door to this, it hurts my own daughter. I have tried to keep her shielded from being hurt. But, I think one of the issues of being honest with her is that she is susceptible to being hurt.
Is this a issue with working with IMs? With 2 IFs there will always be the question of "who is my mom"? Obviously 2 men can't procreate by themselves. So, does working with men stop that pain from happening?
I don't know. I am rambling tonight. This clomid is making me all moody, emotional, crazy.. you name it, I am probably going through it. I would think I was pregnant if I was later in the cycle. LOL
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
New cycle, new plan!
MEDS, MEDS, and more meds!
So, I saw Dr Clare today. We are doing just about the same protocol I used when I got pregnant with Christopher. We will do clomid on CD3-7. That is the only difference, as we did CD5-9 on that cycle. Do a trigger shot the day I get my first + on the OPKs, then do the IUIs the next 2 days. We will start progesterone supplements the 3rd day after I trigger. Wow!!
Today is CD1. So, hopefully this as goes as planned. LOL
The pharmacy called me about the trigger shot. Damn is that expensive!. They ran my insurance and the insurance co pay was actually more than just paying out of pocket for it. So, I just payed out of pocket.
A little nervous about all the meds. I hope they don't make me feel icky. I don't remember any problems the last time I was on them, but that was in 2008. Hopefully this does the trick. I had to cancel my plans to race in Nov. I was hoping this last cycle would of worked. I would of been due right before the race. So, I could of delivered and then headed down to Mexico. At least now, there is no stress. I will be here at home directing the guys from the comfort of my couch. LOL
xoxox
So, I saw Dr Clare today. We are doing just about the same protocol I used when I got pregnant with Christopher. We will do clomid on CD3-7. That is the only difference, as we did CD5-9 on that cycle. Do a trigger shot the day I get my first + on the OPKs, then do the IUIs the next 2 days. We will start progesterone supplements the 3rd day after I trigger. Wow!!
Today is CD1. So, hopefully this as goes as planned. LOL
The pharmacy called me about the trigger shot. Damn is that expensive!. They ran my insurance and the insurance co pay was actually more than just paying out of pocket for it. So, I just payed out of pocket.
A little nervous about all the meds. I hope they don't make me feel icky. I don't remember any problems the last time I was on them, but that was in 2008. Hopefully this does the trick. I had to cancel my plans to race in Nov. I was hoping this last cycle would of worked. I would of been due right before the race. So, I could of delivered and then headed down to Mexico. At least now, there is no stress. I will be here at home directing the guys from the comfort of my couch. LOL
xoxox
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